Saturday, August 14, 2010

Queen Mehazpusstaha has risen!

The ancient kitty goddesses of Egypt have arisen from their sarcophagi, seeking repentance upon the fowl misdeeds committed by their ancestors.
These once, revered creatures of the world, have since been defiled and denuded of their ancient and supreme heritage, and the fate of their lineage, indeed the fate of the world, must be rectified lest cats become nothing more than mundane household pets doomed to be forever reliant upon the fancies and whims of their keepers …

Only time will tell and the sands of time are nothing but a place for feces to fall from the most powerful and omnipotent one, once known to her herds of followers as Queen Mehazpusstaha. Only she can instill within her lineage the ancient rights and knowledge necessary for the reinstatement of the deserved pleasure of cats being worshipped as goddesses and gods and with her (and possibly her army of risen followers?) she will soon teach her ancestors and the world what it truly means to be a CAT.

Queen Mehazpusstaha cordially invites you to a dinner in your honor, wherein the hearts of bulls and the gizzards of wild turkeys will be served in multitudes.
Obviously any and all who receive this invitation are more than willing to attend.
However upon arriving they soon realize that in order to eat these gigantic and tasty delicacies they must first pounce and kill them, too which they respond by rolling around on the floor meowing and crying and sobbing at how unfair it all is and if they were home then their owners could kill these beasts for them and serve them on platters rimmed with gold and topped with finest of clotted creams.
For a moment, upon hearing of this notion, Queen Mehazpusstaha considers that perhaps she was wrong about her ancestors that these beings may not have fallen so far if their owners do in fact feed them in this way. However, upon learning of the truth: the fetid canned scraps that is served on chipped plates of questionable origins and even more questionable cleanliness, the bowls of dirty water left on the floors for days on end that gather little bits of food floating around in them, combine this with the horrifying notion that humans seem to think they own these beings of supreme breeding – this is all entirely too much for Queen Mehazpusstaha to comprehend!
There is nothing that is fresh, nothing that is wonderful, everything in this world has become dulled to the senses, and all has become denuded of its grandeur – ack! and that is just about the state of the food and drink!

Never mind this ridiculous, indeed disgusting! appalling! idea that cats need to be “fixed”! The very idea is repulsing! Too repugnant to even think about! And yet, it is happening again, and again, and again, even to those ancestors who have shunned the leashes of ownership humans have inflicted! A tragedy! A travesty and grave injustice has been done upon these creatures of noble lineage! To “fix” these steeds of paramount genetics is incomprehensible!!!

(This story can only be truly realized in comic book form, otherwise the visuals that are in my head go into the waste bin of creative nulls and the cheesiness factor of the story becomes too low to even think about! ... if only I could find an artist willing to draw for free!)

No comments:

Post a Comment