soul map

there is no map where i travel

there is no path that i seek

there is no light to guide my way

the truth is within my eye

for i am the beholder of falsehoods

i am the beholder of lies

forgotten until the world grows dark

forgotten until time has ceased to exist

forgotten until the truth is known by all

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there is no truer place than the heart

there is no truer place than the soul

there is no truer place than the mind

the heart burns through hate

the soul burns through fear

the mind burns through deceit

one cannot behold the other

before dawn’s light

shines rays upon the dawn of truth

one cannot betray the other

within the darkness of our souls

shadows falling across the edges of our thoughts

we are yet to be defined by these lines

we are yet to be declared by these walls

we are yet to be defiled by these truths

until the dawn

we stand in the shadows

of another’s truth

(inspired by this quote: “It is not down in any map; true places never are.” ~ Ishmael, Moby Dick ~)

9+ lives

In a former life I was king of the world. The land was mine to reap, the women were mine to behold, and all the children that were before me were my own.

In a former life I was nothing. The world was black and cold all around me. The air stood still and the passage of time was non-existent.

In a former life I was golden and bright as a morning star. My rays shone over all the land and shimmered above the seas. The glory of my warmth was held and cherished by all.

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In a former life I knew exactly what I was doing, I took all the necessary steps that took me in the proper direction to reach my goal and in the end there was nothing that I had left unaccomplished. Perhaps that is why in this life I have no idea what’s happening. I have no idea what the next step will be. I have no idea what the future will hold. Any steps that I may have made up to this point appear to be null and void within the span of my life and the final results remain elusive. There is no longer any certainty. There is no longer any safety. It is all a crap shoot and one can only hope that the dice do not end on the devil’s eyes.

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In a former life I saw the world as my oyster. There was nothing that could stand in the way of my goals. There was nothing that could deter me from meeting the challenges that swept into my path. There was nothing that I could not remedy by the twitch of a finger. Perhaps that is why in this life everything is a struggle. The world appears to hold a hand over my head, a constant gray cloud forms over my home and there is nothing but fog and mist before me.

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In a former life I held the earth in prayer. I sang to her rhythms and watched the sun rise to birth another day. I hummed along the tune of her song and gave homage to the wonders that were presented before me. I gave thanks to the moon for rising so that I could savor another night’s passing. And I rejoiced in the calling of another cycle making its turn around the wheel of time.

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In a former life I watched the world die. The trees dropped their leaves and the plants refused to give. The waters dried up and the birds no longer sang their songs. The creatures of the night became the revenge of the mother and her children were left to whither for their sins.

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In a former life I touched a thousand lives. They opened their hearts to me and allowed me to see into their souls. I watched them triumph over the challenges that the fates had set before them and followed their movements along the path. I rejoiced in their failures, hoping that they would learn from their mistakes, and I gave thanks when they moved beyond this mortal veil.

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In a former life I wandered far from the confines of the every day. I gathered sun beams in my pocket and took the silver rays of the moon to sleep with me in the night. I held the stars in my eyes for all to see their glory and I let the skies tumble into themselves to behold within my arms.

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In a former life I was a warrior. I slayed the demons of the night and created my own path through the darkness. I held no fear of death for I knew its sweet song since my birth and the notes were sweet to my ears. I never forgot what my mother taught me, to kill is to survive, to die is to surrender.

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In a former life I wandered the streets and heard the whispers along the wind. I traveled through hidden doorways and sank deep into the shadows of the town. I felt at peace where the darkness lingers and shadows creep along the cold dank walls. I welcomed the darkness as she sang me her song.

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In a former life I betrayed my mother, stabbed my lover in the back and tortured my children.

In a former life I slayed the demons, exalted the heathens and played with the damsels in distress.

In a former life I loved only one, bore only his children, and died within his arms.

In a former life I stole the hearts of men, played games with their minds, and triumphed over them all.

In a former life I groveled beneath your feet, placated your every whim, and died upon your salvation.

snow covered mornings

There are some things that are unmeasurable, the span of a life, the time it takes one to rouse the body awake from sleep, the length of seconds it takes one to remember the tasks for the days ahead, and then there is the measurable things, the amount of time it takes to drive to work, the amount of time spent at work, the amount of time you are allowed for your breaks, but within those spans of time there is also time that is unmeasurable – the moment of realization that these tasks are not all that there is, there is more to life than moving from one thing to the next, there is the silence in the days, there is the beauty that one can behold of the snow covered trees, there is the falling snow through the fog covered landscape and not for the first time I have wondered if there is anyone else who stops their car in the middle of the road to take the photo that will hold this image in memory. Am I the only one who sees the beauty of the trees? Am I the only one who hears their words as I pass them by every morning? Am I the only one that greets them each and every day? Am I the only one?